you're reading...

Dangerous Nostalgia by Ricky De La Rosa

Dangerous Nostalgia

this isn’t what I came here
to do

this isnt what i came here
to say

somewhere between the bookshelves
and the singalongs
and the campfires
and the funeral pyres
and the mascara cascade
on a wednesday when Jeni may or not be pregnant
and the sunny thursday when veronica finds out that she never can be

somewhere on the way here
i took too many exits

somewhere between you and me
im gonna forget what we were talking about
but I remember it being interesting

I remember feeling like
yes this is all there is
and we’ve been
waiting our entire lives for it

I remember asking
why anybody would leave
silk sheets especially
when the other body
is even softer

I remember the smell
of a fresh spliff
on a snowy day

I remember seeing
the looks on people’s faces
when I told them I was gay

but I only remember because
none of the people that mattered

I remember seeing
the look on my face when
I thought the world was ending
both times

I remember figuring out
that getting fucked up
wouldn’t make me start
hating myself any less

I remember trying to figure out
why we lie to each other
about these things

Because I remember when
all I was trying to do was be honest

to somehow communicate the fact
that when you move
your face at a 23 degree
angle away from the sun
I can see each individual hair in your beard
sparkling like there is still some hope left

And goddamn it makes me wanna
hug you for making it around
the sun with me this many times when
there are 584 kids in Uganda who are going to die
because we haven’t figured out how
to ship them one of the six and a half million cheeseburgers
McDonalds is gonna make today

And it turns out i’m still sweating the little stuff
Stressing about the psuedosciences
of partisanism and born
again bible misinterpreters
and I’m yelling
and nobody’s listening anymore
because I’m losing my voice

by Ricky De La Rosa


About renowriterscollective

aspiring writer, thoughtful thinker, dance floor prancer, RWC curator


3 thoughts on “Dangerous Nostalgia by Ricky De La Rosa

  1. this is really good Ricky, you really have a talent 🙂

    Posted by margo vigeant | December 11, 2011, 9:26 pm
  2. I like the flow of this. Well done

    Posted by Gus Johnson | December 13, 2011, 4:25 am
  3. I like the line that starts with: Somewhere between you and me, I’m gonna forget what we were talking about. This poem really captures the process of nostalgia, the juxtaposition of present moment and what we remember, the seeing, the smell, the feeling. Especially in December, nostalgia can be dangerous for me. Good poem.

    Posted by Eileen Driscoll. | December 18, 2011, 4:42 am

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: